Sexual Turn On

I found a post this morning at Scarlett Diaries about what turns people on. She listed some turn-ons and turn-offs. In the impressionable frame of mind I'm in right now, I think I'll follow suit.

What turns me on? Hearing that little, satisfied moan he makes when he first enters me. Sam hardly ever makes any noise, but when he gets in a certain rhythm, he makes these animal-sounding huffs, grunts, moans, what-have-you. Turn on! My mistake, though, is it turns me on to a point that I start making noises, too, and I think he deliberately stops making noises to hear me better.

I love the V-shaped torso. I never even realized it turned me on until we started dating. We were at his place one evening, and he was preparing to do some laundry, and he took his shirt off. Sam has a hideous tattoo on his back. I'd seen it before. Seen him shirtless before, but when he took his shirt off and turned away from me, I couldn't help but notice the nice, V-shaped torso, narrowing down to the slim, firm hips/buttocks, encased in easy-fitting Levis. Flip-side, excessive hair on a guy's torso, turn-off. Luckily, Sam has escaped that Italian trait.

The first pair of jeans I bought Sam were not Levis. He looks good in those jeans, but Levis just look like they're custom-made for him. Certain fits (501s, for instance) look better than others (560s). So, instead of making this all about Sam, I will say, a man in a pair of jeans that fit him (it's different for everyone, for some guys, it's casual slacks, Dockers, whatever), who walks with pride, turns me on. Fliip-side, the big-baggy jeans that are in style right now? Yuck.

Wide shoulders. There's just something about wide shoulders that makes me feel so protected and delicate. I'm no little girl myself, but I love getting a hug from a man who has wide, proud shoulders. Flip-side, constant slouching is a turn-off.

A kiss in that spot, you know the one, where my neck meets my shoulder/collar bone... not sloppy-wet, but not completely dry, just nice, soft lips, slightly parted, and the feel of his tongue darting out to taste my skin, big turn-on. Flip-side, slobbering all over me in an attempt to cause that same reaction, turn-off.

He occasionally takes a handful of my hair (I have mid-back-length hair) and pulls a little while he's making love to me. From behind, just slight pressure to keep my head up and back a little. In missionary position, he might wrap his arms around behind my shoulders, and hold on to my shoulders to anchor himself and me for a few deep plunges, capturing more than a little hair in his grasp. Oh, yes. Pawing and pawing and pawing your way through my hair, unsuccessfully trying to move it out of the way to plant a kiss or a love-bite on that spot I talked about, seems fake, planned. Oh, no. Also, accidentally pulling just a couple hairs, and not releasing them when I try to pull away, turn-off.

He smacks my ass while he's taking me from behind. I know it's coming, because he'll slowly rub his hand in a circle, then pause, then, *smack*. He does it because he knows I'll make some noise (moan, gasp, whimper), and knowing that turns him on turns me on. When he ceaselessly toys with my ass, whether out in public or even in private when I know he has no intention of making use of the moisture that pours forth from me when he does it? Irritation, turn off.

I guess I could go on all day. I think this is sufficient for now, though.

Sexually Normal!

Well, we got the results back from the bloodwork Sam's doctor did. They called Saturday. I was thrilled to get the results so quickly, but I kind of wish they had told us something different.

They said Sam's blood shows no signs of abnormal levels of anything. So he's normal.

I know, it sounds weird to say this, but I kind of wish they had found something wrong with him, so they could medicate it, or treat it, or tell him how to fix it, so there would be an end in sight to this interminable drought!

No, I don't want something to be wrong with Sam. No! No health problems at his age! I already worry that I'm going to be old and alone, because, though he's younger than I (by less than a year), he's lived a much harder life, and I'm afraid his past has aged him. You know?

I just wish there was some medical reason for our almost-sexless marriage.

Instead, I just feel like a freak, or something, not being able to get it enough.

As far as what we're doing for it, we went to the pharmacy section of the store the other day, and just kind of perused the bottles of the herbal section. It jumped out at me. Ginseng! Of course! I used to have a guy-friend who swore that all his sexual energy and abilities could be attributed to the Ginseng he took. (I never slept with him, but it sounded like a good story, so...) We found a complex of ginseng and royal jelly.

We'll see if it works. I'd love to be able to get Sam into a first-shift job, have him eating properly, and just avoid this stuff naturally. But he loves his job. It makes him feel good about himself. So we'll tough it out for a couple years, until he (hopefully) can land a day-shift job at the same place.

Every hand's a winner, and every hand's a loser
and the best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep.

(No clue why I thought of that line from the song The Gambler by Kenny Rogers. It just slipped in there, while I was thinking, 'do the best you can with what you have.')

Talk Dirty

And after that lovely post just moments before, in which I used the phrase "...our almost-sexless marriage," I have a hot little story to share! (No, I am completely contradictory! heh heh)

Yesterday, I had taken a shower and gotten dressed, and Sam was just getting out of the shower. I was wearing short little Nike shorts and a t-shirt with the sleeves cut off, getting ready to go play volleyball. Nothing sexy. However, when Sam climbed out of the shower and toweled off, he apparently saw my outfit as having a different effect entirely!

I was standing at the sink, bent just slightly at the waist, brushing my teeth. I imagine that my booty might have been shaking a little. (I'm a very enthusiastic tooth-brusher!) Sam reached around me for his hairbrush, and, in his naked state, he brushed my ass with his cock. I felt it, but not wanting to get wound up and be disappointed, I tried to ignore the tingle in my shorts. He continued to find reasons to move this way and that ('Check this mirror, check that mirror. Back to this mirror...'), ceaselessly brushing his rapidly hardening cock against my ass.

Finally, I started playing right back at him. Instead of bending further at the waist as I was brushing my teeth, I would bend my knees just slightly, then straighten, then bend, then straighten, effectively putting a little pressure back at him as he brushed back and forth, back and forth. Thus distracted, it took me about twice as long to brush my teeth as it normally does.

As soon as I was done brushing my teeth, though, I walked into the bedroom, presumably to find something with which to put up my hair. I was followed by him, as he was led by the most beautiful, full-mast cock. While I was puttering around on the shelves where I keep my hair stuff, he was fumbling with the hem on my shorts, pulling, pushing, making his way into my shorts and my undies. Finally, I gave up on my quest for the perfect hair-thing. I turned to him, and we started kissing.

Most of the rest of it, I won't bore you with. Just married-couple sex, for the most part. BUT...

While Sam was going down on me (which he has the most excellent talent for!), he was licking here, there, and everywhere. With his mouth securely fastened to my clit, he inserted his forefinger into my pussy. That was awesome. With his thumb, he was massaging my asshole, which was fantastic. I was in heaven! When he actually inserted his thumb into my ass, and was doing something that felt like rubbing his thumb and forefinger together, I went over the edge.

I'm not normally much of a noisemaker during sex. I moan, I whimper, and I grunt some from time to time. I sometimes talk a little when I orgasm ("Oh, oh, oh... I'm gonna cum, oh, gawd, YES!"), but I don't, like, yell or scream or anything like that. It's just never been my nature.

Yesterday, when he made me cum like that? It crossed my mind to hope the neighbor's son wasn't outside playing, getting an earful.

And when all my little particles came back together after that orgasm? Well, he teased me, slowly rubbing my pussy lips and clit with his cock. He would occasionally dip into me, then slowly pull back out. He slapped my clit with his cock a couple times. Then, when I was squirming, and about to ask him to just fuck me?

He went down on me, and did it again.

We played for about an hour and a half, the last 5 minutes or so with his cock up my ass, then we had to leave to go to my game. He never did get off.

So guys: Question.

Do you like it when your girl makes noise? He seems to intensify whatever motion we are making, whether he's going down on me, or we're just going at it, when I make noise. But I don't know if he's intensifying his motion, trying to make it that much better for me, or if he's reaching for his own climax (during the actual sex part), encouraged by my noises.

If you do like noise, do you like just the general mindless chatter, do you like her to say your name, or talk dirty, or what?

Sexual Energy

Sam is on his way to the doctor this morning, to discuss and hopefully resolve the waning libido energy deficiency thing.

I asked him yesterday, if he loved me 'like that.' I mean, there's no doubt that he loves me. A lot. Beyond reason I think, some days. But, we've known each other for years and years, and it would be perfectly understandable if his undying, intense love for me was friendship-love, so intense that it could be mistaken by him as romantic-love. So I asked.

The conversation didn't go on long, and we were both in tears at the end of it. But they were good tears. He is overcome with every conceivable kind of love for me (excepting mother-love, and other such weirdness), and it brings him to tears when he thinks about it. Happy tears. And I, well, I am the luckiest girl in the world, to be loved so completely and utterly, and it brings me to tears every time it's reaffirmed for me.

And Sam said, when I asked if he's sexually attracted to me, 'I think about throwing you down and raping you all the time. It's just that I don't have that kind of energy.'

So this morning, he's going to bare his manhood soul, leaving his pride vulnerable, to his doctor and ask for suggestions. It's an energy thing, it's not a waning libido thing, from what he said yesterday. That was my fear, and I don't know if the doc will tell him anything besides to find a job that doesn't ream him with 3rd shift, and to quit smoking.

Keep your fingers crossed for us, won't you? Of course, if this gets resolved, you know you'll be rewarded for your finger-crossing with juicy, delicious, sex-filled posts, instead of this rather depressing drivel I've been going on with of late.

Sam's Libido

Has anyone out there ever dealt with waning male libido? Sam says he's willing to go to the doc and talk about his problem, to see what his doc has to say about it. (I'm the luckiest girl in the world!) See, Sam claims to have a slight chemical imbalance. I don't know enough about it to say yes or no, but I won't doubt it.

Anyway... I did a lot of searching yesterday for herbal supplements for the libido thing. I found a lot of promising-sounding gibberish, but I don't want to run right out and pay money for anything until he talks to his doc, so as to avoid any harmful side effects. The last thing we need is more complications!

He doesn't need Viagra. He has no trouble getting it up, keeping it up, or finishing it off. His problem (that he doesn't really see as a problem, but I have a problem with it, so he's willing to do something about it) is low libido, underactive urge, dampened desire. There are a million and ten reasons for it, but nothing we can really do anything about. So we're going to try to give him an extra boost, to help him overcome all the reasons we can't do anything about.

From what I gathered yesterday, any testosterone-boosting complex would help.

Anyway, yeah, he said he'd call the doc. Hopefully he can get in for an appointment and we can find something out soon.